Thursday, May 22, 2008

Footprints in the sand....my butt

Here of late, I've been educating the non-Catholics I know of the Footprints in the Sand poem....

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you."

While it is a beautiful sentiment and something in my heart I do believe, my cynical self says "Lord, it's been tough. Children are abused, molested, killed. Quakes, hurricanes, cyclones, tornadoes are killing thousands of people. People are suffering from cancer, etc. Where are you, Lord? And please don't give me that footprints in the sand garbage."

Funny, that I'm the one (yes, me the loud mouth, unsocial bitch) that has kept my faith that all will be well with our son. While my good Catholic boy husband says that God has forsaken him along with his parents and sister in heaven who aren't helping Andrew. Sometimes God doesn't always make things easy and He sometimes can't give us what we ask for...we just have to keep the faith and trust that everything will be okay. And we surely can't be angry at dead relatives who while I truly believe they are in heaven....can't change our fate or lot in life. It's always the well educated, devout religious folks who have the hardest time keeping faith when life gets tough and me, the poor white trash from Illinois, leading the band as the ship goes down.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Wanted: Dog that doesn't shed, have bowel movements or urinates

I "Google talked" my husband today and said I wanted to go to San Francisco for a trip. He said, "okay, anything to make you happy honey" (NOTE TO SELF: Ask for more things after husband returns from four day trip to Florida - granted it was to see his dying aunt - but still ask for things while husband is feeling guilty about leaving us for four days!).

After he said, "anything to make you happy" - I asked if we could get a puppy. He said "sure if you can find one that doesn't crap or shed". I responded, "that wasn't fair - because my 23 year old son doesn't even fall into that category". He responded, "my point exactly".

It's sad but both of us have dreams of what we could do with that extra bedroom and half bath. Actually, it would be nice to have that room set up for a nursery so we can try to adopt but by the time Bryan hits the road both Jim and I will be at St. Charles Cemetery with worms crawling through our eye sockets....but one can dream.

Lots of things going on - birthday parties, graduation parties, summer is coming and I just want to stay home. It's sad being so stressed and tired that you don't want to leave the house. But I keep on chugging along.

Jim's best friend who lives in North Carolina called Jim and said something about "I didn't know Andrew was having surgery". Both Jim and I were trying to figure out how he found out - that he was the great and powerful Oz. Come to find out - I must have given him or his wife the blog site because he read it here. And here I thought no one was reading all the witty, sarcastic antedotes I write. Note to self: Don't ever complain about North Carolina friends.

:-)

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

What the f&ck are you doing!!!!!

Sue Simmons long career in television broadcasting will be known for that line....

Trying to get my husband and his sister on a flight to Florida is more work that Air Force One landing in Iraq. Jesus Christ.

Peggy: Did you try this? Did you try that? (In an effort to save 20.00).

Jim: I thought you booked aisle seats...I did....you are on the aisle - Peggy in the middle. No I wanted aisle seats for both of us. Well, fuck me, for thinking you wanted to sit NEXT to your sister. Carry on, check in - baggage restrictions, liquid restrictions (Peggy wants to take her lotions and talc powder - for Christ's sake stop at a CVS and buy some!)

Jim's brother calling them telling them to pack 2 pair of underwear and some shorts - don't check your luggage I don't want to wait....but he INSISTS on taking off work and picking them up at the airport. The only good thing about all of this is I'm not going!!! Praise the Lord.

I never in my whole life have dealt with such absolute chaos. It's mind blowing. And they are both smart - that is the scariest part of it all - it's insanity. Pray for me.